Tempting Fate in Victoria Falls

After the great hospitality shown to us by Tim & Tiff, we set off for our long journey to Victoria Falls.  Tim & Tiff led the way out, hoping to take us to the top of a local mountain on the way.  Unfortunately the weather was too bad so we stopped on the side of the road and said goodbye to them.  All feeling pretty worn down from the stupid amount of partying we’d been doing the last month, sleeping was the order of the day.  Little Spermy was our drive master and we had faith he wouldn’t fall asleep at the wheel again, even though the rest of us were sound asleep.

From what I understand it was a relatively uneventful drive on a very good road.  We only had to bribe one official along the way, with a toy koala doing the trick this time.  We rolled into Vic Falls looking for Shoestring, a backpackers mentioned/recommended to us by Ling-Ling.  This place had a bar, so we knew we had come to the right place.  But before our bags had hit the ground, the boys wanted to see the Super 14’s semi-final.  A local bar at a big complex called The Kingdom had DSTV, so we went in search of it.  This place was massive, with a huge casino in the centre.  The strange thing was that there was nobody there, only a few staff.  Even though most of the problems in Zim have stopped, the effects on tourism are definitely still there.  We watched the rugby and champions league final, then headed back to Shoestring for the fines meeting.  The plan was for an early night, so the fines meeting was done very quickly and without too much pain, except for Sperm.  We stumbled off to bed, ready for a big day tomorrow.

Waking up to the roar of Vic Falls, the lads were excited to check it out and jump off a perfectly good bridge.  As we walked down the road towards the bridge, the mist from the falls was like rain.  The closer we got, the more saturated we became.  Luckily the mist doesn’t really hit the bridge, so when we got there we had a chance to get dry and check out the falls.  From the bridge you can only see a small portion of the massive falls.  Even though they are very wide, the river that runs down from it narrows again to about 150m.  But even this small amount, with the intense noise and mist everywhere, was very impressive.  But I don’t think the boys really took much notice, they were all worried about the 111m jump they had committed themselves too.

Jase and Sperm decided to do the combination of jumps (bungee, swing, and flying fox), but Jimbo has had knee and back problems, so stuck with just the swing.  I decided to do nothing, as I don’t trust a single piece of rope to stop me from plummeting to my death.  I always say that engineers design things like this, and I know firsthand that engineers are hopeless.  That or I’m just scared.  Either way, the boys lined up for their separate jumps, all very excited about the prospect.  But the look on their faces when all the clips were done up was priceless.  I think it’s impossible for anyone to override their bodies desire to not launch themselves to death, and the expressions really showed that.  But they all leaped off with faith in their tiny ropes and survived to come back to the bar and have a beer.  They were all very excited, with Sperm saying he thinks it’s the best thing he’s ever done in his life.  I must admit too, it did look like a huge amount of fun.

As the bridge is essentially a no man’s land, people from Livingstone in Zambia could come onto the bridge without a visa as well.  This was cool for us, because we got to meet up with the Swede’s again (Baby Bjorn, Micky, and Perry) and also Dom & Henry who we hung out with in Malawi.  Unfortunately the Swedes were heading in a different way to us from there, so we knew we wouldn’t cross paths again.  We caught up for a bit then said our goodbyes, wishing them a safe and awesome journey.  But Dom & Henry were sticking around in Livingstone for a few days, and this day happened to be Dom’s birthday.  Jimbo and Jase weren’t feeling the best and decided they’d head back for the day.  On their way back they did the walk through the national park so they could see more of the Vic Falls from the lookouts in the park.  Well, the mist before was nothing compared to the rain that penetrated from all directions.  Luckily for the boys, they had their Blackwolf waterproof jackets with them, so they stayed bone dry.  They said it was amazing and their photos seem to validate this.  Then they went to watch romantic movies together and fall asleep to Celine Dion.  Sperm and I decided to go on a booze cruise in Zambia with Dom for his birthday.

Finding a loophole in Zambian’s border security, we were able to get into Zambia without paying for a visa, so we essentially gave ourselves US$100 to party with.  We met up with the lads, signed up for the booze cruise, then chilled in Livingstone while we waited for the bus to the cruise boat.  We met Laura and Lindsey while waiting, two cool chicks that were with four other guys cycling down from Cairo to Cape Town.  They let us know that they were all going on the cruise too, as it was one of the guys 30th birthday party as well.  So all on the bus we went, and Sperm and I suddenly realized what we had gotten ourselves into.

Without going into too much detail, the night was probably the biggest Sperm and I had had on the whole trip.  Some highlights were beating a local black chick in a dance off, telling another boat full of passengers we were going streaking, going streaking, locking people in a freezer, and discussing fine wine and politics with some prudish women.  We had run out of money by the morning, so got the free bus back to the bridge.  Finding a loophole in Zimbabwe’s border security, we were able to get back into Zimbabwe without any trouble.  We met Jase & Jimbo back at the Zimbabwe border post and set off for Botswana.  We’ll be in Kasane for a few days, then off to the national reserves of Botswana for about 2 weeks of bush camping until we finally arrive at Gaborone.  So you might not hear from us in a little while.  Until next time, stay safe and don’t go jumping off any perfectly good bridges. Dan.

Harare Mark 2

Our return trip from Lake Kariba wasn’t anywhere near as exciting, and the four hour journey was a straight run. Our GPS loves taking us through the CBD’s and market areas, so I suppose we were ‘lucky’ to see down town Harare.

PJ Sole (more so his parents) were more than happy for us to crash at their house again, which was much appreciated. Have a look at the grounds, so you can imagine the house…

Being a Wednesday we were off to Lime Bar again to catch up with a few more friends. James, Wee-man, Newbs and Jax all made an appearance, as well as Boons brother Pat (its massssive!!!!!). We had a great night partying and meeting new people, all the while paying US$2 for a Gin and Tonic. The night ended with us following Pat and James to the next bar, however they were absolutely smashed and forgot, so went home. They were a little confused why we were following them – the clarity of alcohol.

The smell of bacon and eggs can raise most hangovers from the grave, and with a stomach full of egg and bacon fat, we set about our day. Blogs, football hunting and meat pies were the order and it was good to get up to date with some internet.

We were invited to a friend of a friend’s house for a braii, and what a braii it was. If a butcher ever asks you to dinner, you’re mad to refuse. We were served some of the most tender fillet steak in his shop, and our plates were licked clean. We all set off to another restaurant/bar to watch Derek Baily and Newbs play in their band Evicted. They were great last time I saw them, and playing acoustic was fantastic. Jimbo and I dropped and did the stranded turtle, dying cockroach, and the chameleon, much to the others punters delight (I’m sure). A good night of fun again, then off to home for a quick round of Never-Ever with Dan, Ling-Ling and myself ensured our livers didn’t have a chance, and another hangover was just around the corner (about 4 hours away).

Another slow start for most, and bacon and eggs the savior. Dan hardly moved a muscle all morning such was the state of his hangover, as everyone picked up the pieces and tried to gather their wits. Boon was home, Ling-Ling staggered to the door, and I inhaled the last of the dust from the couch, as we tried to make a move to Tim Holden’s house near Musavingo. Only a short 4 hour journey, and Tim and Tiffany Holden had a great feast and a few cool ales for the hungover and weary travelers. Hangovers were nailed, just in time, as the Holden’s had a few test-tube drinks left over from the wedding. A few tubes nailed, a couple of sticks of biltong torn and shredded, and into bed for our 8hr hike to Victoria Falls, Cory’s bungee jump, and the highly rated gorge swing. Till next time, laters, Jason.

I’m on a boat mofo!

Organising and packing a vehicle with food, booze and all the necessary fishing equipment for a 5 day house boat cruise on a lake really shouldn’t be that hard for an Accountant, two Engineers and an OC Designer…… throw into the mix all being incredibly hung over made us useful as a bag of rotten fruit.

We did manage to depart Harare about 2.30pm and intended to make it to Lake Kariba by sunset to just get out on the water, fortunately when you invite two girls on a trip like this it brings some sort of sensibility to things.   Our initial thoughts were drive till we get there even if we were driving at night, but as everyone knows you should never drive at night time in Africa.  There is simply too much game waking about and the terrible roads in Zim don’t make it an easy task to drive normally.

The drive was a little emotional for both girls as we would be driving past their farms, which were taken 10 years ago.  It was amazing to see the once prosperous areas of farmland now completely destroyed, that also employed hundreds of locals, who were also made homeless when the farmland was taken.  We soon pulled off the highway into The Twin Rivers Hotel, a once gracious hotel where many travelers stayed as a halfway point to Kariba.  After a lengthy discussion with reception they managed to find us some rooms.  Now that we have been traveling for so long through Africa we have seen our fair share of dodgy hotel, this one was no exception.  In one of the rooms it seemed the night guard had secretly set himself up, as we found his jacket, newspaper, headache tablets and last but not least his underwear hanging in the bathroom.  When you’re far away from home and traveling you can really appreciate the different smells that you experience in hotels like this.

We settled in and decided we would check our itinerary to find out the phone number for the slipway where the houseboat was moored.  To this day we are still unsure how it happened, but we soon discovered we had arrived 3 days early into Zim and this meant we weren’t actually getting on the house boat till Sunday!! So all that frantic rushing about while hung over, and playing the blame game for running late, was now, pointless. We all looked at each other and burst out laughing, to which the girls exclaimed they had no idea how we had made it this far in our journey. After a good laugh we went to the bar and then grabbed a feed.

We set off at 6am the next morning with a 2 hour drive ahead down the steep mountains to Lake Kariba. The view of the lake was amazing and made us all excited about the next few days to come.  The house boat was called ‘What a Pleasure’ and is owned by Rowan Miles’ family who very generously lent us the boat for 5 days; all we had to pay for was the fuel, food and booze.

Still only getting used to the how things are done in Africa, we had a cook and a captain to drive us around the massive lake.  Our captain was named Super and had worked for the family driving their houseboats and machinery for the last 30 years. This guy knew every part of Kariba and we were assured that it was going to be a great trip.  After surprising Super, who was busy painting parts of the boat ready for our expected arrival on Sunday, we decided to leave Super and the boat, so he could finish organizing things ready for our revised departure.

Lake Kariba is at a record level and is the highest in 90 years and we had been told the dam wall looked spectacular with 3 of the 6 flood gates open to try and release the sheer amount of water in the lake.  The massive rainy season that had occured in Angola had meant record flows in the Chobe River in Northern Botswana which flows into the Zambezi, and then into Lake Kariba, finally ending in Carhora Bassa, which was where we were staying only a few days earlier.  This would also mean that we would be able to see more game on Kariba as many animals would be stranded on newly formed islands.

We set off for the next slipway where we spent US$490 to fill up the house boat, but when you’re splitting things 6 ways it’s not too bad.

Our first stop would be to Antelope Island, only 1 hour journey from the mariner, mind you she’s not the fastest vessel on the water, so it was always going to take some time. Arriving just before sunset we all piled into the tender to head out on a booze cruise and await yet another amazing African sunset.  With good drinks and great company on a lake in the middle of Africa there really isn’t much more you can ask for in life and definitely an experience I’ll never forget.

The first night on the boat was always going to be the party night, plus it was fine’s meeting so inevitably people would be hurting the next day.  The usual fines were thrown about, stalling, disrespecting the car and other credits for good deeds ensured a good night was had by all.

The second day aboard ‘What a Pleasure’ started with the fresh smell of bacon and eggs wafting up from the galley.  Our cook ‘Rinse… like Rinse the dishes’ had made a feast to stir the crew from slumber.  We would cross the lake to Spur Wing Island, which took about 5 hours.

Lake Kariba is like most lakes in Africa, extremely massive and full of things that want to eat you like Croca-dilla-gator-sharks (anything that can eat you), Hippos and maybe the odd oversized Tiger fish.  Although in the middle of the lake it is too deep for most wild life, so bring on the boat diving.  After climbing onto the top deck and with Super on the lookout for Crocadillagatorsharks, we soon realized it was definitely higher than expected almost 6m but we still jumped and was a good rush all the same.

Our journey across the lake continued and we made our way to Sanyati West Bay where we saw an elephant swimming in-between two islands.  We spent the rest of the afternoon playing board games then fishing for bream in the shallow waters mostly to catch live bait for tiger fishing. That night we had an amazing BBQ and a few more drinks and a few more laughs.  We asked Super to make up beds on the top deck again, so we could sleep under the stars.

Day three was meant to be Tiger day but no luck, we did however see plenty of game which made the morning worthwhile.  Once we got back to the boat we moved to the most popular spot on the lake, when we arrived, there were already several boats moored in the area.  That afternoon we headed out again in search the elusive tiger fish, however still nothing, so we amused ourselves by throwing most of our dead bait fish to the fish eagles.  We returned back to the boat and picked up Dan and Boon, they had been busy that afternoon painting each other’s nails, doing their hair, and getting wasted.  After they were ready we stocked the esky and went out for another relaxing sunset booze cruise.  The silhouettes made by all the dead trees made for a postcard finish to the day.

We returned back to Antelope Island the next day as the girls would be leaving early on Tuesday, being the last night on the boat with the girls we made a silly effort to finish most of the booze by playing drinking games.

The next morning the question of everyone’s lips was…WHY?????  A casual reply from Jason “Why Not, we’re on holidays”.  Still that didn’t help with the overall sickness felt by everyone.  We made it back to mariner and helped pack the girl’s car, somehow we managed to convince them to go to town and bring us back fresh toasted sandwiches.  While we waited Super and Rinse cleaned a few things on the boat. We began to wonder if the girls would ever return at all, but they did and were met with full praise and hungry bellies.

The WNT lads had decided to stay out on the Lake one more night to try and catch a Tiger fish.  We made our way back out to the opposite side of Antelope Island and had a little nap.  That afternoon Jas, Jimbo and I headed off for a spot of tiger fishing near the bream farm.  There are about 5 different bream farms situated around the lake, which are huge metal ring structures with netting all over them to keep the fish in and keep the wildlife out.   Situated about 100m around the nets is a ring of floating bouys.  At this stage we had decided if there was going to be a tiger fish in Kariba it would be there, in no time we headed to the top on the farm and started drifts by the nets casting within half a meter of the nets each time.  STRIKE!!!! Straight up Jimbo gets a massive bite from a tiger and jumps in the air flapping about only to jump off in a second.  This had the boys pumped; we started up the engine and made our way back to the top of the farm.  It was on this time Jimbo landed a nice 2kg tiger on swivel lure and Kapenta.  Next it was Jason turn STRIKE!!!!  It was on but nowhere near as much fight as Jimbo’s but nevertheless, tiger number two in the space of 20 mins, and a decent fish it was, pushing the scales almost to 3 kg’s.  We were all thinking why we hadn’t been doing this the whole time, until we looked up and noticed that down the other end of the farm they had just finished feeding two of the pens.  Surely it will be like shooting fish in a barrel, with even more excitement we quickly raced down the other end of the farm, firstly driving past the main office which was another stationary barge.  We waved to all aboard but didn’t really get a return wave, quietly interested I noticed a sign placed on the buoy saying, “THERE IS NO FISHING WITH IN THE BREAM FARM UNDER THE FISHING ACT ……… AND IN ACCORDANCE WITH THE ZIMBABWEAN REVENUE AUTHOURITY, PLEASE STAY OUTSIDE THE DESIGNATED SECTION BY 100M”.  Well we figured they would have been able to see us before hand so maybe they don’t care that much.   We made our way to the opposite end of the farm and started casting; I was landed amazing casts within centimeters of the nets getting plenty of praise from my fellow fishermen, WOW how things can change in seconds when the thrill of catching tiger is quickly cut short by wild cast into the middle of the bream net.  I gave it a few pulls but it was well and truly stuck.   I have never seen evil eyes from Jason and Jimbo burn through my skin so quickly.  Not only had the boys fishing been interrupted, now there was a tender boat with about 8 very official looking blokes heading our way.  My name was mud but we quickly moved closer to the nets and climbed over it, with the help of Jas were able to retrieve the wayward lure.   We managed to jump off the nets, slowly putter away, recast our lines to make as if we had done nothing wrong.   A loud voice echoed over the lake “What are you doing inside netted area???  Where is your permit???? What are you doing here???”, it was clear they weren’t at all happy with us climbing all over their nets or being in the no fishing area so we replied in the best way we could think of, “Gday how are you going?  Lovely day for Tiger fishing isn’t it?”  We continued back and forth playing ignorant and then eventually said “yeah sorry we’ll move now, yep seeya have a good one”.  They weren’t really happy at all and just kept yelling out as we slowly reversed “Make sure you do not fish inside this area”.

Awesome Tiger fishing was now over… and now there is an extreme sense of hatred in the air, that will probably be everlasting.  Anyways, it was a quiet night at dinner but we decided that we would get up before dawn and at least get a couple of runs in past the nets before the guards wakeup.

Morning broke and we were out on the water before sunrise just as planned, first run past was uneventful, until Jimbo noticed my line pulling a little bit, “Cory do you have something?”, on previous fishing occasions I have been known to catch a lot of certain fish namely the ROCK, STUMP, BOOT, and REED variety so I was keeping very quiet until I saw at least some part of fin or tail.  A few reels later I started to really feel the pull on the rod, Jimbo yelled “Strike him, Strike him!!”  Within a few frantic minutes of fishing I had landed myself my first Tiger fish ever!!!  Our excitement was soon squashed as we noticed the same boat load of officials making their way over to us.  We quickly started the engines and moved just outside the buoy area and started fishing again as if nothing was wrong.   Maybe they didn’t notice, maybe they were coming to congratulate me on my first tiger fish?  Who knows?  Ummm they weren’t, and slightly more annoyed then the previous day, he yelled “What are you doing inside the bream nets? Where are your permits?”   Jason calmly interrupted the officer with “Gday Sir, sorry about that we didn’t realize we had floated inside the buoys, promise it won’t happen again”.  Annoyed he couldn’t get any bribes/money out of us they soon left and we continued fishing for another hour but with no luck, not surprisingly the blame for not catching more tiger was placed on me.

So we shortly headed back to the boat and packed up ready to leave, we were going to be driving back to Harare to see some more mates and have another night out on the town.  We are hopefully going to spend a few more days in Harare due to now being so far ahead of schedule, until next time thanks for reading and we will chat to you soon, from The Why Not Tour Adventurers, Laters.

UPDATED:  Fixed up all the spelling errors.  Writing a blog while hungover is never a good idea.  Sorry about that.

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  • 1 car, 4 Aussies, London to Cape Town in 4 months